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2.0 Communication Skills

Information cannot be effectively received, transferred or exchanged without using good communication skills. Good communication skills will enhance your relationships with friends, family, colleagues and the families you work with.

When working with women respect for the women's own thoughts, beliefs, and culture are a part of good communication. When you share information with a mother and demonstrate that respect she will gain the confidence to make the decisions that are right for her and her family.

You can use communication skills to:

  • Listen and learn about the woman's beliefs, level of knowledge and her practices

  • Build her confidence and praise practices that you want to encourage

  • Offer information

  • Suggest changes the woman could consider if changes are needed


© DIAC Images creative commons


Good communication skills results in the person with whom you are having a conversation:

Lack of communication skills results in the person with whom you are having a conversation:

Workbook Activity 2.1

Complete Activity 2.1 in your workbook.

Personal Qualities

You will need to develop a trusting relationship with the women, men and families you are assisting at this important stage of their life. Carl Rogers, a world-renowned psychotherapist, described three qualities essential to constructive communication: genuineness, non-possessive love and empathy. Communication skills, without the presence of these three factors, are associated with harmful therapist-client interactions.

Genuineness

The first of these is genuineness. Sometimes called congruence, it means being honest and open - what you really are without front or façade. The genuine person knows it is impossible to be completely self-revealing, but is committed to a responsible honesty and openness with others.

Non-possessive love

Also referred to in some texts as 'unconditional positive regard', but probably meaning more than this phrase allows. 'Non-possessive love' refers to your ability to accept, respect and support another person in a non-paternalistic way. This includes all of the client's frailties and weaknesses, as well as their strengths and positive qualities.

The 'love' you exhibit has the characteristics of patience, fairness, consistency, rationality and kindliness. It encourages freedom.

Empathy

Empathy refers to the ability to really see and hear another person and understand that person from their perspective. 'Putting yourself in their shoes.' Psychologists describe the Apathy-Empathy-Sympathy continuum.

Apathy Empathy Sympathy
"Yes, well mothers are constantly tired." "Broken nights can be very tiring." "I don't know how you cope with being woken so often."
"There's nothing wrong with breastmilk." "You're worried your breastmilk may be too thin." "It's so scary when all your baby has is your milk."

Apathy is a lack of feeling, while sympathy is 'feeling for' another person. Empathy is 'feeling with' the other person. Empathy involves experiencing the feelings of another without losing one's own identity. If you lose the ability to separate your own feelings from the feelings of another person, you are no longer empathetic.

Practise makes perfect!

Communication skills are not something to be turned on and turned off at particular times. Develop your skills talking with your family and friends - practise them all the time.

What should I remember?

  • what you will achieve by using good communication skills in your interactions with mothers
  • the outcome when you use good communication skills; and the corollary when you don't
  • the difference between apathy, empathy and sympathy

Self-test quiz

Match an item from the column on the left with an item from the column on the right. Click on an item in one column, then on its matching response from the other column